My First Cervical Screening Experience at 26.
I am 26 years old, this means that in the UK I am eligible for my first Cervical Screening or (Smear Test), same thing just different name. You've probably seen the incredible response online to the #SmearForSmear campaign recently, organised by Jo's Cervical Cancer Trust.
Cervical cancer is the most common cancer found in women under 35, yet one in three young women don't attend their smear test. I was one of people until January 2018.
After reading the capacity of my brain in articles, forums, and blog posts I booked my first appointment. I was also tired of the constant pressure from people around me to get it done. I know it's importance but you know life gets in the way and it sometimes doesn't seem 'that important' you know. It is important. Your health is incredibly important. SO Monday 30 January, 9.20am. I booked the morning off work and then wrote the date in my diary, ever looming. It was around a week away. Shit a brick.
BEFORE THE TEST
My initial invitation to go came before my 25th Birthday, not the best present to receive but definitely the most important. I've been avoiding my smear for nearly 2 years this July. The fear that transports itself through my body to my mind was unbearable. A test like this has filled me with an increased level of anxiety and questioning, 'what if I get cancer?' 'I'm not ready to die', 'I've got a niggle in my pevlic area, it must be cancer. shit shit shit' and I can barely cope with everyday life, let's not throw me another spanner to cope with, please. I needed to change this, bite the bullet and get the job done. Plus not every girl is comfortable with just letting someone check out your vagina, you know.
Since I booked the appointment I've been going through the different outcomes in my head, preparing myself whatever the outcome may be. My anxiety makes this kind of thing very difficult.
I think what terrified me was the most about the experience was wait between the results. For someone with anxiety I need to be in complete control of my life as much as possible and no, not for this test. I'd have to wait for 2-6 weeks, live with my terrifying thoughts before a conclusion has even arrived at the door. Urgh not good about that.
I decided to call the Jo's Cancer Trust helpline on Friday, I was pulling my hair out with worry and I'd ignore my boyfriend's reassurances that I'm going to be ok and there's nothing to worry about. The helpline was an absolute knight in shining armour and I'm so glad I took the time to pick up the phone for some support. She also offered me their call back service which meant that after the screening was done she would ring me to check how the procedure went, as well as seeing whether I had anymore questions.
Nobody looks forward to having their smear test.
THE PROCEDURE
Before I went I also wanted to 'present' my vagina in a way I felt comfortable with, sounds stupid but it put my mind at ease. I had a shower in the morning, put on some of the underwear I felt most confident in and made sure to wear a dress and tights. I did worry about it a lot, 45 minutes before my appointment I definitely sobbed in fear on the phone to my mum.
If you aren't confident in going to the appointment alone then you can take someone in with you, I couldn't and this definitely played on my mind. But you can do it alone too.
In hindsight I shouldn't have worried whatsoever. I rocked up to the appointment 5 minutes early, did some breathing exercises and drank lots of water to keep myself hydrated. I was greeted by a smiley nurse who ushered me into her office. Before the procedure she asked a few questions surronding my general health and periods, gave me an brief explanation of the procedure and said that we were doing this together. She then asked me to pop my bottom halves off and pop myself on the bed whilst she organised the equipment used. Now, before this I had heard the speculum used would be plastic so imagine the horror that filled me when they didn't have any plastic ones available and I'd be having a metal one inserted in me. I instantly felt terrfied and wanted to run, obviously bit of a toughie when your bottom half is not clothed but anyhow.
You are asked to put your feet together and your knees apart so that she can see the vagina properly and be able to perform the procedure. It was fine. This person looks at vaginas all day every day. I'm sure she didn't judge the fact that I had shaved the night before. She lubed up the spectlum and it felt like a sex toy had been inserted into my vagina (please God never let my family read this post). I honestly didn't feel anything after that. Before I knew it it was out and all done. I was shocked. Are you sure hun? It was uncomfortable but wasn't painful and was done within minutes. I popped on my tights and knickers then was sent on my way. The nurse instructed me of the next step and hoped I would have a good day.
Now the wait is tough.
I hate having to wait for results so for 14 days I decided to keep myself preoccupied and fill in my diary with lots of fun stuff to do.
Today is 12 February, exactly 2 months since my Smear Procedure and my results arrived in the post today.
'Your cells at this time are normal'.
Hallejuah!
I am so relived you wouldn't believe. It has definitely got me thinking and I wanted to share my experience because so many people have said their anxiety has held them back from making an appointment too. Please let me assure you that those 5 minutes spent awkwardly showing off your lady area is definitely worth it in the long run. With around 3,000 cases of cervical cancer diagnosed each year in the UK its important we do our part in looking after ourselves.
If you do need support I would definitely get in touch with Jo's Cancer Trust, they were definitely there when I needed them.
And please ladies if you have been avoiding the letter please ring and book your appointment.
Emmie x