REVIEW | Ricky Sim: Coming Out To Dead People

Written by Bronagh

Disclaimer: Gifted tickets in exchange for an honest review.


Ricky Sim, a lawyer turned comedian from Queens, describes himself as ‘your gaysian uncle who can’t shut up about the early 2000s’. The pre-show music certainly was a nod to the 2000s – who doesn’t love some Pussycat Dolls and Paris Hilton pop classics? The word ‘gaysian’, however, was new to me… one of many new words and phrases that I learnt throughout this hour-long delve into Ricky’s own coming out story.

Ricky is stood in front of the Soho Theatre audience to share the story of his mother’s death, intertwined with him coming out as gay, as well exploring Asian and queer stereotypes. He tells us that he was deciding whether to come out to his mother, around the same time that she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Not good timing, in Ricky’s opinion! Ricky is quick to make us laugh, and also to ensure the audience that it is okay to laugh at the dark moments and experiences that he will be describing. He has a wonderful talent of reflecting on past, solemn experiences and then breaking through the tense atmosphere by making a very witty, sometimes explicit, remark. From reflecting on the difficulties around coming out to his Malaysian parents bouncing towards a comment on Grindr or pornography, hardly any stone is left unturned in this tale!

Ricky is such a likeable performer; listening to him is like sitting and listening to a good friend. His side notes after certain lines – ‘too dark?’ – really do help to break the barrier between just watching a performance and truly listening to a story. There were one or two slip ups, which to be fair were not noticeable or a hindrance at all. They were generally acknowledged by Ricky and rectified, to laughs from the audience. This really does add to the reality of the story; this is a true story that is likely to resonate with a lot of viewers in London and worldwide.

Coming Out to Dead People is a great addition to shows that explore Asian identity, shows that really do deserve representation in main stream media. He describes experiences he had a young gay man – Sean Paul anybody? – all whilst thinking about whether to come out to his conservative, Asian mother. Complexities between race, culture and sexuality are expertly explored alongside feelings and experiences relating to loss and grief, love and family. 

Coming Out to Dead People is already critically acclaimed, and already a well deserved award nominee. The mix between dark humour and literal laugh out loud humour is brilliant, and perfectly executed. I would love to see this show go further afield and reach wider audiences, while maintaining it’s small quirks that make it so likeable. 

At Soho Theatre until 24th January 2024.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

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